Fancy a date – with yourself? Why more people are embracing solo dating
Ever tried solo dating? While self-care is nothing new, doing fun activities on your own is gaining popularity. Here’s why you might want to give it a go.
Whether it’s a gallery visit or dinner at a fancy restaurant, 43-year-old Emily Barnes regularly schedules solo dates into her calendar.
The outings allow her to see and do whatever she wants and be “totally selfish”.
“It’s about getting a change of scenery and collecting new experiences,” Emily says.
“I’ve always enjoyed my own company, so having little solo adventures has never felt too threatening.”
Emily ramped up her solo dating nine years ago after her son was born, regularly taking trips by herself to the local cafe.
These days, as a single mum, she uses the time she’s not parenting for solo adventures.
“I now save my most interesting outings for my solo dates,” Emily says.
“I very much see the solo date as something to be celebrated, rather than a consolation prize … the great thing is if you feel self-conscious, you can just bail out.”
What exactly is ‘solo dating’?
Solo dating is the act of going on dates and doing activities alone, rather than with a partner or friends.
Sydney psychotherapist Eugenie Pepper says it’s always been around but has recently gained popularity on social media with younger generations.
Some are inspired by self-care – taking time for yourself to maintain mental and emotional health – or by travel influencers championing solo travel as a way to gain new experiences and confidence.
Either way, Eugenie says, solo dates can be an important and rewarding way to explore your interests and learn more about yourself.
Benefits of solo dating
“One of the main benefits of solo dating is the freedom and flexibility,” Eugenie says.
“When you go on a date alone, you have complete control over your time and experience – you can choose the venue, activity, and pace of the date, rather than having to compromise or coordinate with someone else.
“It creates a sense of accomplishment and achievement.”
Emily says the me-time helps her achieve work-life balance, and fuels her creativity for her job as a strategy consultant.
“When I do these solo dates, I suck in all of these new ideas and information, and that comes out in my work, which is awesome,” Emily explains.
Is solo dating right for you?
Eugenie says solo dates are not just an excuse for self-indulgence; they’re for anyone desiring independence, personal growth, new experiences and to meet new people.
She believes solo dating is increasing as women feel more comfortable going out alone.
Anyone can benefit from solo dating, she says, but it’s more likely to be embraced by independent, confident and adventurous types, as well as busy people, singles and those lacking a large social circle.
“As long as you’re enjoying it, there’s nothing wrong with it,” Eugenie says.
“But if you’re doing it, and your real desire is to be with other people, then that’s a downside.”
Fun ideas for solo dates
- Visit a museum or gallery
- Read a book at a coffee shop
- See a movie
- Go hiking
- Do a road trip
- Dine at a fancy restaurant
- Luxuriate at a day spa
- Book a dance lesson
- Explore your hometown as a tourist
- Watch a stand-up comedy show
Read more on self-care and flying solo:
- Why treating yourself can do wonders for your motivation
- Solo workouts: health benefits of exercising alone
- 5 simple ways to weave self-care into your daily life
- 5 reasons being single is good for your wellbeing
Written by Melissa Iaria.
